Defense

Victoria and Gordon were in love. Victoria’s father did not approve and would not let them marry. Her father reigned over a fairly large kingdom. He was afraid of being ridiculed and possibly weakened due to this interspecies romance. It’s worth mentioning that Victoria is a lioness and Gordon, a bonobo ape.

They came to the conclusion that to be happy, they would have to start life anew, far from the reach of Victoria’s father’s power. They wandered for months before settling on a new home. It was enough like the place they left to be comfortable, yet far enough away to go unperturbed. There, they were sure, they would start their family.

They adapted well to their new home. Gordon quickly ascended to power. It helped that he had a lioness behind him. He found himself the king of their territory with Victoria as queen in little time.

A group of marauding chimpanzees got wind of the new, growing empire and saw Gordon’s infancy as a ruler as a weakness they could exploit. They had spies within the domain and were gathering information. Gordon was a fair and generous leader so one of the turncoats turned once again and alerted the king of the plot.

After discussing the situation with his advisors, Gordon came up with a plan. Their numbers and strength were weak compared to the ferocious, brute strength of the hordes of chimpanzees. It was decided they would use a biological solution; the employment of killer bees.

Gordon had the advantage of knowing exactly when the attack would take place. It was to jump off at day break in three days. Defensive preparations were made and bees were secretly gathered from all around the kingdom and beyond.

The fateful day came. A conch shell was blown to call the commencement of the attack. The chimps were me by thick clouds of bees. The jungle vibrated with their loud buzz. Screams echoed through the trees. The chimps dispersed in confusion. Some fell right away due to anaphylactic shock. A few jumped back into the river only to have their muscles seize and be carried away to their watery end.

Gordon sent his first wave of infantry to counter attack. Armed with spears, they made quick work of the remaining, confused chimps. Most were writhing in agony. The chimps spared by bee or spear saw their imminent failure and ran to save themselves. The battle didn’t last more than thirty minutes from the signal to attack.

Gordon and his subjects were ecstatic. They hadn’t suffered one casualty. Their only strife no was the inconvenience of having to remove the carcasses of their fallen primate foes. After that was taken care of, they put all normal activities on hold to have a mass celebration. The festivities went well into the night.

A little after nightfall, Gordon, slightly intoxicated, went looking for Victoria. He was told she had already retired to their royal quarters. He was more than happy with this revelation. His victory had made him rather randy and he wanted to celebrate intimately with his queen.

As Gordon pushed open the door to his bed chamber Victoria pounced upon him.

“Oh, my love, I think you’ve read my mind!” he said. Feeling sharp claws digging into his sides, he immediately realized she had other intentions.

“No you fool! I’m through with you! The last domino has fallen. I shall reign over our, I mean MY, kingdom by myself from now on” she replied.

In shock and in great pain he managed to ask “WHY?”

“I’m tired of living this freak show life. My father was right, it’s not natural. Besides, you cannot give me what I most want, a son!” she said, digging her claws even deeper and baring teeth.

“Look at what we have built, my love. Look at all we have! We have survived, conquered and endured” he pleaded.

Victoria shouted an order in a strange language. In came two chimpanzees with dressed wounds. “Take him out of here” Victoria ordered in the language of the chimps.

The chimps muffled Gordon’s pleas for help as they drug him away.

Tricky Cindy

 

Cindy was a mild mannered, mostly jovial and self-described positive person. But one should never bring up the Lidman brothers in front of her. To this day, no one knows what trespasses Steve and Adam committed against her, but their sin must have been mortal because Cindy wanted nothing less than their destruction.

Over the course of a few weeks, she devised what she thought was a pretty good plan. She put it in motion by chatting them both up on a messenger over the internet. She started with small talk and light flirting that escalated to more raunchy conversation. The lewd chats led to exchanging nude photos. The culmination; dates were set for sexual encounters to take place.

When she was with Adam, she told him she was on the pill so they didn’t need to use protection. With Steve, she insisted on using condoms. Given that both men were engaged to be married, their secrecy was secured, even from one another. The affairs went on for three months until she acquired exactly what she wanted, a baby.

She told both men they were the father. They had mixed feelings about the news. On one hand, both were ecstatic they made life. They were both deeply religious men and to them all life was precious, especially life that they brought into existence. On the other hand, this could make their lives turbulent, to say the least and the guilt of betrayal was overwhelming. Neither professed love for Cindy, but both promised to provide for their new offspring.

Given that she was having unprotected sex with Adam, she knew he was the father, but she convinced Steve that he was the only man she had been with recently and furthermore, it was statistically possible to get pregnant even using condoms. He figured a DNA test would make waves and rock the boat of his otherwise dull and stable life. He gave her the benefit of the doubt. With the trap set, she was ready to spring it.

At the forth month of pregnancy, she went to Adam with grave news. She was going to abort his baby and move far away. The news devastated Adam. Besides this being one of the worst sins to his faith, he felt a piece of him was going to die as well. Cindy took extreme pleasure in watching him grovel and beg not to go through with it. She left him a heaping mess and drove off.

Now she set her sights on Steve. She was really going to have to move far away so Adam would believe the abortion story. She moved in with an Aunt in Florida under the guise that she would help the lonely elder woman and in turn receive help during her pregnancy.

She had the baby and made arrangements with Steve for gargantuan child support payments. They were sealed into a contract. The trap was sprung. She got her revenge on the Lidman brothers. Adam believed his unborn son was murdered, though he was actually alive and thriving and Steve was paying a small fortune every month for a child that was not his.

Home Is For The Birds

Pilot and Skye had a beautiful home, high up in the trunk of a dead tree. A wood pecker hollowed out an already rotting part in search of a meal. He found what he was looking for and abandoned the site when the food ran out. It was  a perfect home for a young couple of swallows.

One day Pilot went out to look for some food. He gave Skye a kiss on the beak and went his way. He flew almost a full mile until he found a promising location. He looked around for a perch to assess the area. He saw a branch with a wide angle view of the ground below.

Already on the branch was a beautiful female swallow.  Pilot thought he should maybe find another branch but she waved him over with a wink.

“Hello” she said.

“Hello” Pilot said.

“Name´s Libi” she said.

“I´m Pilot” he said, blushing.

“That´s a strong name. Are you a strong bird?” Libi asked.

“Well, not really, I guess I can be” he answered. Libi stayed quite. She knew that silence can drive a male mad.

Pilot´s mind raced, searching for something to say, to break the deafening silence. All he could come up was, “Do you live close?”

“Close to what?” Libi giggled. Pilot blushed again. Libi leaned over and kissed him on the beak. An explosion of emotions rushed over Pilot. The thought that rose to the top was “What am I doing?”

Swallows are hard wired for monogamy. They take a mate for life. This went against thousands of years of evolution.

Pilot pulled away. “I cannot do this! I already have a female”

Libi said with a devilish look, “You do and you don´t now”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, the moment you return home, your “ex” will smell my pheromones on you, so you don´t. But, you have me now” she said.

Pilot wanted to protest but he couldn´t. She was right. Dejected, Pilot asked “Where do you live?”

“I don´t have a home, dear” she answered. “You have to make one for us”

“Oh great…” Pilot thought.

Over the course of a week Pilot made a home just as good as the one he left.  Two days after, Libi kicked him out.

“I thought we were going to be together forever” Pilot said.

“That´s so old fashioned. That instinct must have passed over me” Libi said.

“What am I going to do?” Pilot cried.

“I don´t know. Do the same as the others. Go crawling back to your old home” Libi said.

“Others?” Pilot asked.

“Yeah, the others that I tricked into building me a house. I´m just going to flip it for some quick cash” Libi said.

Pilot wanted revenge but realized this would just get more of her pheromones on him. In fact, he was so busy working, he hadn´t had contact with Libi for days. He flew off to see if he could get his life back.