A half hour after the tray of drinks had been consumed, Alonzo felt incredibly dizzy. His eyes betrayed him. They wouldn’t stay open and when they were, his vision was blurred. His legs felt like jello. He succumbed and collapsed on the spot.
He woke up in a hospital. A nurse came in to check on him and he asked her where he was and what time it was.
“9:00 am, in Mercy Hospital” she said, not even taking her eyes off of her clipboard.
“9:00 in the morning?? I slept through the whole night?” he said. He was extremely saddened to find out he had lost yet another night. He rationed, at least he had one more.
“No hun, you lost two nights. It’s Monday morning!” she said, finally looking up at him, “You had an ungodly amount of homemade barbiturates in your blood. You slept like Cinderella. Doc almost called for a prince to come kiss you awake” she scoffed.
“Oh no! My flight is in two hours. I gotta go!” he said in a panic.
“Hun, you’ll only get released in two hours. You better hold your horses”
When he was finally released, he realized his cash was gone. Credit card, too. He went to the hotel. His bag was confiscated by police when housekeeping found what they thought was cocaine.
“It wasn’t even real” he screamed.
The manager felt so bad for Alonzo he offered the $120 needed to catch a bus to go back home, from his own pocket. Alonzo dejectedly accepted.
The manager left him with one last pearl of wisdom, “Miami ain’t for amateurs, son.”
On the bus back home, Alonzo was sat next to a beautiful woman. She was warm and willing to talk to Alonzo. “How can this go wrong?” he lamented to himself.
Their conversation went great. They seemed to hit it off well. Alonzo glorified his adventure, softening or completely leaving out the most embarrassing parts and playing fast and loose with the truth. They even made plans to go out the next weekend together, back in their home city.
Both decided to get some sleep. They said their last goodbye; to anybody this side of existence. At 3:00am a truck driver, high on methamphetamine swerved into the lane they were traveling on. Not a single person on the bus survived. Because Alonzo had no I.D. and the scale of destruction of the remains of the passengers was so great that identification was impossible, what was scraped up of Alonzo was sent back to Miami to be buried.
The End.
It is great.
Best wishes.
Thanks for taking the time to read it. 🙂
What a terrific twist – and so sudden! I was looking forward to his first date with the lady on the bus (you should know me by now!) You have a gift for being able to create these series of plots that make the reader want to come back to see what happens in each instalment. I think there’s a bit of Alonzo in most guys in their younger-ish years!
Thanks Bruce! That was really nice to read. I HAD to end it there because I really wanted him to be stuck in Miami.
I had a LOT of Alonzo in me in my younger years, especially the inadequacy with the LADIES! lol
Damn.
Thanks for reading it, brother! I take “Damn.” as kind words! Hugs
Kind word it was. I lived that… all but the tragic bus accident. The way you wrote it really hit home. Very impressive.
Thanks! Yeah, my older self was no saint and I pull from some of that old depravity. I’m glad we are both here to be able to talk about it (hopefully with better heads on our shoulders). It could have easily gone the other way. You keep up your thing. You are an inspiration. I don’t even remember how I found your blog, but I am glad I did.
Thanks, brother. I shall.
“Miami ain’t for amateurs, son.” Truth! You’ve woven another story, Ryan… as if you genuinely knew/know Miami. Have you watched the Netflix series “Bloodline”? You could be a writer for that show! Or it’s sequel. I loved “The End.”
Thanks Eric! I have not seen that series, I’ll look into it. I just finished one so I need another one to watch. Thanks for the recommendation. Funny thing about your comment, I think I have spent a combined total of six hours in Miami, my whole life. I passed through on a day visit more than ten years ago. I had to use Google to get the hospital name! Thanks for reading it and thanks for the kind words.
Ryan, that is an amazing short story. I wish I could grab a reader’s attention almost instantly the way you did. It was not over detailed or crazy developed but I was captivated the entire time. Thanks for writing!
That might be top ten highest praise I’ve ever gotten here. Thank you so much for reading it and thanks for the kind words.