What´s That Smell?

28 Feb

apartment

“What´s that smell?” Herbert thought as he started his day in his one bedroom apartment. He remembered perceiving a similar foul smell the night before but now it was considerably worse.

When he came back from work the smell was magnified tenfold. It had been a sweltering hot day, with a threat of afternoon rain that never materialized. He left the windows closed for fear of the rain encroaching upon his apartment.

He all but tore his apartment apart looking for the source of the effluvium. He ruled out his apartment as the font of the putrid stench. Then he put his nose to the floor.

He found where the smell was coming from. Then, his heart sank. Mrs. Santos, an 82 year old widow lived below him. Now that he´d thought about it, he hadn´t seen her for days. Nobody ever came to visit her, so he thought the worst.

As he dialed the police, bittersweet thoughts passed through his head. On one hand, 82 years is not a bad run. On the other, she died alone and was literally rotting due to her solitude.

The police and ambulance showed up quickly. Herbert showed them to Mrs. Santos’ apartment. As the police officer knocked on the door, Herbert wiped a tear from his eye. The tear had more to do with the parallels in his life with Mrs. Santos than for the loss itself.

A taxi pulled near the apartment block but nobody noticed. The police were ready to force the door open when a little old lady approached from behind “Oh my!” she exclaimed, “What´s all this fuss?”

“Mrs. Santos!” Herbert cried, “We thought something terrible happened. There´s a terrible smell coming from your apartment and I haven´t seen you for days!”

“Oh my goodness! I was on a seniors retreat the past few days. I´m so absent minded lately. I must have cleaned a metric ton of beef shanks and ribs the day before I left. I guess I forgot to take out the trash with the trimmings” she explained.

Everybody accepted the story and exchanged pleasantries. Upon entering, Mrs. Santos opened her suitcase. She pulled out a box of charcoal air filter cartridges, a case of aerosol air freshener and four dead cats.

As she threw the dead felines into a heap of already decomposing animals in the hall closet she muttered “I´ll rid the world of you evil beasts with the angels in heaven as my witness”

2 Responses to “What´s That Smell?”

  1. Bruce Goodman February 28, 2019 at 11:13 pm #

    Yuk! Excellent!

    • Ryan March 1, 2019 at 12:54 pm #

      That is a most excellent compliment, my friend! Thanks!!!

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