Finger It Out

8 Nov

Finger

Lucas had lost many things in life, money, homes, lovers but there was only thing that he truly missed. It was the one thing he truly gave a damn if he ever saw it again. His finger.

He lost it on the other side of the world repelling down a mountain. His equipment malfunctioned and he was sent plunging twenty feet in a free fall. Luckily, a safety mechanism caught him from falling all the way to the ground. When the adrenaline settled, he looked at his hand only to find he was a finger lighter.

Nowadays, Lucas found himself in a constant dire need of cash. He was living in his car. He was constantly hungry. He was desperate.

One day a friend told him he could make some easy cash. All he had to do was simply board a plane, with $20,000 taped to his legs and deliver it to an unscrupulous fellow in Thailand. “What a break!” He thought.  

The day came and he was prepped. His legs were shaved to facilitate the removal of the tape. He was also given beta blockers to take his nerves down a notch and make it easier to act natural. Then he was loaded up with $10,000 on each leg.

He made it through security on both sides without incident. He found a car waiting for him at the airport. Everything had gone smoothly and he was off. During the ride he kept thinking how the $2000 he was going to earn from this job was going to change his life. Also, strangely, he was experiencing and unusual amount of phantom itching where his missing digit once resided.

He finally arrived at the drop off. He climbed what felt like 1000 steps. He was out of breath when he reached the top. There was an innumerous amount of armed men milling around. None looked very professional, but not to be messed with all the same. One wearing a strange necklace caught Lucas´s attention the most.

“Is that what I think it is?” he thought. “Oh, shit, it is” he confirmed to himself. It was a human finger on a string. He figured the man must have been a guerilla soldier. It wasn´t a stretch, many of them end up in shady security details, such as this one.

As he was waiting to be seen, he could not take his eyes or mind off of the man with the finger around his neck. Even after he was called for by the boss, the finger consumed his mind and the phantom itch increased.

He was listening to niceties from the recipient of the money as another thug cut the cash free from the tape around his leg. The finger. All he could think about was the finger.

“Is there any request or desire I could fulfill for your hardships?” the boss asked Lucas.

“Well, yeah, there´s this one thing, but it´s kind of weird” he replied.

“Go on, I´ve heard it all” the boss said, intrigued.

“Ok, can I see the finger hanging on that guy´s neck?” he said, pointing sheepishly at the security guard.

The boss said something to the security guard that Lucas would have to study over a decade to understand. The guard stepped forward. The finger was definitely from a Caucasian donor. That surprised Lucas. Then his eyes grew so wide the balls almost fell out of his head.

Upon closer inspection, Lucas saw the homemade mustache tattoo his cousin put on him behind his uncle´s shed.

Reading Lucas’s face, the boss asked “Is everything ok?”

“That´s my finger!” Lucas answered.

“Are you sure the boss asked?” the boss asked.

“For sure” he answered.

After a quick exchange in Thai with the security guard the boss asked “Would you like it back?”

“Yes” Lucas said with tears in his eyes.

“It´d be my pleasure to see this reunion” the boss said. At that moment the security guard slipped the cord from his own neck and put it around Lucas’s.  

 

 

3 Responses to “Finger It Out”

  1. Bruce Goodman November 9, 2018 at 1:51 am #

    Excellent! Although you’ve added a new dimension to “giving the finger”.

    • Ryan November 9, 2018 at 12:23 pm #

      Thanks Bruce. I always fingered you for a nice guy!

      • Bruce Goodman November 9, 2018 at 4:34 pm #

        LOL! The nicer the better!

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